We all have had those moments and instances when BS happens, and you are used to reacting in a negative way. A car can be driving slowly in front of you in the left lane and you are running late. You are minding your business and someone comes up to you and just talks your ear off for no reason, and they won’t shut up. Someone calls out at work and you have to do your job and their job with no additional help. You have told the server 2 different times that you want your steak medium, and it comes out well done the third time. You only have ONE nerve left and that one person is tap dancing all around it, and it is only a matter of time before they step on it. Any of these sound familiar? I can only answer for myself by saying YES YES YES! There are at least 4-5 times per day that at least one of these kind of situations happens to me, and I used to curse, blow up, scream, and anything else that just happened to come out. Hello! My name is James, and I am not ashamed in admitting that I used to let shit get to me. I used to let it it all get up under my skin, and fester and grow, until all of the nasty suddenly popped out. I was… IMPATIENT.
I especially noticed my lack of patience when it came to situations with people being dishonest, lying, cheating, being careless, etc. I would hold onto the anger until it became bitterness, and then the bitterness became acrimony. Something had to be done for the sake of my mental health and sanity. I began to research yoga, meditation, breathing exercises, and self care regimens. From the research I collected, I found that doing these things could be surprisingly easy and simple to do. I had to be completely honest with myself and reflect deeply about my current mentality. Being a nurse, I see all the time, the effects of stress, worrying, and anxiety. It definitely can affect your health in a negative manner. After a brief reflection, I made the choice to take ownership of my impatience, and to use meditation, breathing exercises, and self care to change the way I react to situations.
I am not going to be dishonest and say that I noticed the changes overnight. It was a process, and still is. It is so easy to fall back into what you are comfortable and familiar with. Change is scary for a lot of people because it is not familiar. But sometimes, change is necessary for growth and prosperity. Eventually, I began to notice that certain situations did not affect me like they used to. I began to notice that what certain people did or said didn’t bother me like it used to. With the help of meditation, breathing exercises, and self care, I came to the realization that shit happens, and I don’t have to entertain it! Everything can be viewed as a learning experience, and often we are presented with situations that we are meant to learn important life lessons. If you have placed yourself in a situation that turned out to not be good for you, review the situation, note the mistakes, learn from those mistakes, and move on.
I can honestly say that taking a few minutes to yourself, several times a day if need be, to go to a quiet place and close your eyes and just breathe in deeply and with every breath out, imagine a negativity being exhaled… WORKS! Massages… they WORK! Aromatherapy… it WORKS! Soothing music playing when you are driving… it HELPS to calm you! A nice long sit in the soaker tub with candles… it WORKS… for me. I am telling you what works for me. Also, talking about (with your confidant) what is bothering you, what is annoying you and releasing that shit to the atmosphere… it WORKS. Honey, I wouldn’t have believed it until I tried it for myself! You have to research and find what will work for you, because everyone is different. A lot of things that may work for me, may not work for the next person, but I promise you that the most mentioned and talked about ways to cope with stress… they work.
Now, I am the happiest I have ever been. Disappointments and uncomfortable situations may present before me, but I know that I am able to get through them, and I am able to deal with them. It is my choice as to what I choose to focus my energy, and what I choose to ignore. I have the tools and resources to help keep me stress free and happy.
I challenge each of you who also deal with being impatient to reflect inwardly and find the method of stress relief that best fits you. I challenge you to be consistent with those methods, and before you know it, you are going to notice out of nowhere, that you have experienced growth.